154: Authoritative isn’t the best Parenting “Style”

“On average, authoritative parents spanked just as much as the average of all other parents.  Undoubtedly, some parents can be authoritative without using spanking but we have no evidence that all or even most parents can achieve authoritative parenting without an occasional spank.” 


I was fascinated by this statement, since authoritative parenting is the best style.  


We know it’s the best, right?


I mean, everyone says it is.  Including me.


And who was the co-author on this paper this statement comes from?  


None other than Dr. Diana Baumrind, creator of the Parenting Styles (although they weren’t called that then; they were originally called the Models of Parental Control.  


Just to make sure we’re on the same page here, I’m going to say that again: Dr. Diana Baumrind, who created the parenting styles/model of parental control, says you can’t achieve the parenting style that has the ‘best’ outcomes for children without an occasional spank.


So in this episode we dig pretty deeply into what makes up the parenting styles, and what Dr. Baumrind and others found about the effectiveness of these styles, and what impacts they had on children.  (And I have to warn you now, the samples sizes we’re looking at to ‘prove’ that authoritative is the best parenting style are going to make your stomach churn.)


FREE Setting Loving (& Effective!) Limits workshop is getting underway

The Flex Path version of the Setting Limits workshop is getting underway!  


I know some folks want to be told exactly when to do things, but others want to go at their own pace and do things when THEY have time.  In our new Flex Path option, you can receive new modules as fast as you complete them.  We wouldn’t advise rushing through, as then you’ll likely miss the benefits – but you also don’t have to wait for anyone else’s schedule.


If you do want to be told exactly when to do things then our Guided Path option is for you.  The main content will be sent to you between May 9-13, with a bit of pre-work the preceding week.


At the end of the workshop you’ll know how to set limits your child will respect.  And you’ll also know how to set WAY fewer limits than you ever thought possible – and instead to have a collaborative, joyful, ease-filled relationship with your child.


And it’s totally free!


Click the image below to learn more about the workshop and sign up.  You’ll select the Flex Path or Guided Path option after you’re enrolled.  See you there!



About the author, Jen

Jen Lumanlan (M.S., M.Ed.) hosts the Your Parenting Mojo podcast (www.YourParentingMojo.com), which examines scientific research related to child development through the lens of respectful parenting.

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